Mother's Day

[Liliandra]

So here's a question....How does one go about mother's day with the eventually future mother in law and grandmother in law to bes? I've been invited to go to lunch with the family (I've spent every holiday with them since my bf and I have been together) but what is the proper way to go about things....I'm sure if he gets a card I could sign it with him like he'll do for my mom, but what about sending flowers or something?

 

[SouthernN'Proud]

I don't speak to my M-I-L any more, so...


We handle the holidays quandry as equitably as possible. We try to split the time on the major ones, and the others are more whatever we can do. If that ruffles feathers, tough. Everybody gets at the very least a card and a meal from us on birthdays, anniversaries, and mother's/father's days.

 

[tonksy]

if you like the woman i would think that flowers would be lovely! bonus points if they are still in the pot and are perennial! she can plant them and think of you every year they come back.
of course, i just send a card to my mother. god help me if i forget.

 

[Liliandra]

hehe....both his mother and grandmother are in town so god help us if we should forget, lol......My mom (technically step mom, but whatever at this point) is in Oklahoma on the other hand, think she may have to settle for a card, though I suppose if I supremely felt the need I could send her flowers too....Was thinking of something like a vase of mixed flowers or something...nothing crazy (don't have a lot of money) but I don't want to over step bounds either....I love both of them to death don't ya know

 

[tonksy]

sending flowers is actually very expensive. i would think a gift certificate of the same value would be more appreciated in the long run.

 

[Liliandra]

Probably in the end yeah.....Think I might talk with his sister and see what she is doing, maybe just joining forces with her might be best.

 

[Winky]

You are her (soon to be) "daughter-in-law".

Go for it like she was yer mommy!
If she don't like it find out now rather than
20 years from now
'God I wish Lil would stop treating me like a Mom'!

 

[Liliandra]

lol....true enough I suppose...she's adopted me in the loving mom way so I suppose I should be able to do my part as well. hehe

 

[unclehobart]

Nothing says happy mothers day like an oversized pyrex dildo.

 

[tonksy]

i can think of a few things.....not many...but a few.

 

[Leslie]

Perhaps one that required batteries.

 

[PrincessLissa]

I am confused on this as well. My mother is an ungrateful woman who never shows appreciation for anything. I spent 10 straight hours cleaning her house once as a surprise once and she had the nerve to tell me that I had at least started the job. Once when my brother and I were younger we pooled all our money together (which isn't much for young kids) and did chores for another $5 to get my mom a birthday present. I rode my bike to the store and bought her favorite choclate covered cherries, a card, and a small bouqet of flowers. We hid the gifts and when she woke up in the morning we brought her the gifts and she just sort of looked at them and didn't really say anything. We both went to school that day very very upset.

In other words. I have gievn up on my mother, but now it's almost Mother's Day and Erik's mom makes a huge deal of these holidays and I have no idea what to do. Her birthday is also very near by. I think I am going to just sign a card from both of us with a little present that she will like.

 

[Inkara1]

Shower Erik's mom with gifts and cut your mother off completely. If she bitches, say that Ann Landers always said to cut the person off if thank-you notes are never received.

 

[Lopan]

Tell her you have one with her name on it if she turns. Then give her the flowers.

 

[tonksy]

Shower Erik's mom with gifts and cut your mother off completely. If she bitches, say that Ann Landers always said to cut the person off if thank-you notes are never received.

perfect!

 

[Mare]

I already mailed my mom a snowbaby that plays "you are my sunshine"....My M.I.L passed away, a few years now, awesome woman......she is dearly missed.....

Lil....goodluck on the gift and hope you find the perfect one that suits them...

 

[Luis G]

I second Inky's suggestion

 

[Liliandra]

I am confused on this as well. My mother is an ungrateful woman who never shows appreciation for anything. I spent 10 straight hours cleaning her house once as a surprise once and she had the nerve to tell me that I had at least started the job. Once when my brother and I were younger we pooled all our money together (which isn't much for young kids) and did chores for another $5 to get my mom a birthday present. I rode my bike to the store and bought her favorite choclate covered cherries, a card, and a small bouqet of flowers. We hid the gifts and when she woke up in the morning we brought her the gifts and she just sort of looked at them and didn't really say anything. We both went to school that day very very upset.

In other words. I have gievn up on my mother, but now it's almost Mother's Day and Erik's mom makes a huge deal of these holidays and I have no idea what to do. Her birthday is also very near by. I think I am going to just sign a card from both of us with a little present that she will like.

I definitely had this problem with my real mom as well..My step mom is better so that's good, I just never quite know what to do anymore considering all the dissapointments when I was younger (my brother and I had a lot of the same stories ourselves.)

 

[Stop Laughing]

My mom's already gotten plenty this year, and she does appreciate it, but still does that nagging thing that I just can't stand where she still tries to dictate to us how things should be done yet not do anything herself to help or even support what she preaches, so hypocritical. She left me hanging yesterday, though, as she had a change in plans and didn't tell me when she had the chance and I ended up standing around in the cold for an hour and a half with no way to reach her. Anyways, Mother's Day here is the same every year, a very nice brunch buffet with her, my brother, and her mother and me. Father's Day is just a day to retotal how much we're gonna sue him for in a year or so when the child support totally stops.

 

[PrincessLissa]

I definitely had this problem with my real mom as well..My step mom is better so that's good, I just never quite know what to do anymore considering all the dissapointments when I was younger (my brother and I had a lot of the same stories ourselves.)

I never quite know what to do when the MIL says "I love you" and wants to shower me with affection. It's not normal for me to hear a family member say "I love you" and such. Don't get me wrong, I think it is great and should be said a lot more than it is, I just get a little confused.