kat2220
New Member
GET READY TO CRACK UP!!
>>CUZ IT'S ALL TRUE!!!
>>
>> Subject: Fixin to go to Atlanta
>>
>>This is for anyone who lives in Atlanta, who has ever
>>lived in Atlanta, has ever visited Atlanta, ever plans
>>to visit Atlanta, knows anyone who already lives in
>>Atlanta, or knows anyone who has ever heard of
>>Atlanta, Georgia.
>>
>>Atlanta is composed mostly of one-way streets. The
>>only way to get out of downtown Atlanta is to turn
>>around and start over when you reach Greenville, South
>>Carolina.
>>
>>All directions start with, "Go down Peachtree" and
>>include the phrase, "When you see the Waffle House."
>>Except that in Cobb County, all directions begin with,
>>"Go to the Big Chicken."
>>
>>Peachtree Street has no beginning and no end and is
>>not to be confused with
>>Peachtree Circle
>>Peachtree Place
>>Peachtree Lane
>>Peachtree Road
>>Peachtree Parkway
>>Peachtree Run
>>Peachtree Terrace
>>Peachtree Avenue
>>Peachtree Commons
>>Peachtree Battle
>>Peachtree Corners
>>New Peachtree
>>Old Peachtree
>>West Peachtree
>>Peachtree-Dunwoody
>>Peachtree-Chamblee
>>Peachtree Industrial Boulevard
>>
>>Atlantans only know their way to work and their way
>>home. If you ask anyone for directions they will
>>always send you down Peachtree.
>>
>>Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. That's all they
>>drink there, so don't ask for any other soft drink
>>unless it's made by Coca-Cola.
>>
>>Gate One at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport
>>is 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear
>>sneakers and pack a lunch.
>>
>>The 8am rush hour is from 6:30 to 10:30 AM.
>>
>>The 5pm rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:30 PM.
>>
>>Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon and lasts
>>through 2am Saturday.
>>
>>A native can only pronounce Ponce De Leon Avenue, so
>>do not attempt the Spanish pronunciation. People will
>>simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you.
>>The Atlanta pronunciation is "pawns duh
>>LEE-on".
>>
>>The falling of one raindrop causes all drivers to
>>immediately forget all traffic rules. If a single
>>snowflake falls, the city is paralyzed for three days
>>and it's on all the channels as a news flash every 15
>>minutes for a week. All grocery stores will be sold
>>out of milk,bread, bottled water, toilet paper, and
>>beer.
>>
>>I-285, the loop that encircles Atlanta that has a
>>posted speed limit of 55 mph (but you have to maintain
>>80 mph just to keep from getting run over), is known
>>to truckers as "The Watermelon 500."
>>
>>Don't believe the directional markers on highways.
>>I-285 is marked "East" and "West" but you may be going
>>"North" or "South". The locals identify the direction
>>by referring to the "Inner Loop" and the "Outer Loop".
>>If you travel on Hwy 92 North, you will actually be
>>going southeast.
>>
>>Never buy a ladder or mattress in Atlanta. Just go to
>>one of the interstates and you will soon find one in
>>the middle of the road.
>>
>>The last thing you want to do is give another driver
>>the finger, unless your car is armored, your trigger
>>finger is itchy and your AK-47 has a full clip.
>>
>>Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their
>>feet in the air.
>>
>>There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in
>>Georgia.
>>
>>There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in
>>Georgia, plus a couple no one has seen before.
>>
>>If it grows, it sticks. If it crawls, it bites.
>>
>>It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
>>
>>"Fixinto" is one word (I'm fixinto go to the store).
>>
>>Sweet Tea is appropriate for all meals and you start
>>drinking it when you're 2 years old.
>>
>>"Jeeeet?" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
>>
>>If you understand these jokes, forward them to your
>>friends from Atlanta, Georgia and those who just wish
>>they were.
From a bit south of the Big Chicken
>>CUZ IT'S ALL TRUE!!!
>>
>> Subject: Fixin to go to Atlanta
>>
>>This is for anyone who lives in Atlanta, who has ever
>>lived in Atlanta, has ever visited Atlanta, ever plans
>>to visit Atlanta, knows anyone who already lives in
>>Atlanta, or knows anyone who has ever heard of
>>Atlanta, Georgia.
>>
>>Atlanta is composed mostly of one-way streets. The
>>only way to get out of downtown Atlanta is to turn
>>around and start over when you reach Greenville, South
>>Carolina.
>>
>>All directions start with, "Go down Peachtree" and
>>include the phrase, "When you see the Waffle House."
>>Except that in Cobb County, all directions begin with,
>>"Go to the Big Chicken."
>>
>>Peachtree Street has no beginning and no end and is
>>not to be confused with
>>Peachtree Circle
>>Peachtree Place
>>Peachtree Lane
>>Peachtree Road
>>Peachtree Parkway
>>Peachtree Run
>>Peachtree Terrace
>>Peachtree Avenue
>>Peachtree Commons
>>Peachtree Battle
>>Peachtree Corners
>>New Peachtree
>>Old Peachtree
>>West Peachtree
>>Peachtree-Dunwoody
>>Peachtree-Chamblee
>>Peachtree Industrial Boulevard
>>
>>Atlantans only know their way to work and their way
>>home. If you ask anyone for directions they will
>>always send you down Peachtree.
>>
>>Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. That's all they
>>drink there, so don't ask for any other soft drink
>>unless it's made by Coca-Cola.
>>
>>Gate One at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport
>>is 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear
>>sneakers and pack a lunch.
>>
>>The 8am rush hour is from 6:30 to 10:30 AM.
>>
>>The 5pm rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:30 PM.
>>
>>Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon and lasts
>>through 2am Saturday.
>>
>>A native can only pronounce Ponce De Leon Avenue, so
>>do not attempt the Spanish pronunciation. People will
>>simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you.
>>The Atlanta pronunciation is "pawns duh
>>LEE-on".
>>
>>The falling of one raindrop causes all drivers to
>>immediately forget all traffic rules. If a single
>>snowflake falls, the city is paralyzed for three days
>>and it's on all the channels as a news flash every 15
>>minutes for a week. All grocery stores will be sold
>>out of milk,bread, bottled water, toilet paper, and
>>beer.
>>
>>I-285, the loop that encircles Atlanta that has a
>>posted speed limit of 55 mph (but you have to maintain
>>80 mph just to keep from getting run over), is known
>>to truckers as "The Watermelon 500."
>>
>>Don't believe the directional markers on highways.
>>I-285 is marked "East" and "West" but you may be going
>>"North" or "South". The locals identify the direction
>>by referring to the "Inner Loop" and the "Outer Loop".
>>If you travel on Hwy 92 North, you will actually be
>>going southeast.
>>
>>Never buy a ladder or mattress in Atlanta. Just go to
>>one of the interstates and you will soon find one in
>>the middle of the road.
>>
>>The last thing you want to do is give another driver
>>the finger, unless your car is armored, your trigger
>>finger is itchy and your AK-47 has a full clip.
>>
>>Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their
>>feet in the air.
>>
>>There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in
>>Georgia.
>>
>>There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in
>>Georgia, plus a couple no one has seen before.
>>
>>If it grows, it sticks. If it crawls, it bites.
>>
>>It is not a shopping cart, it is a buggy.
>>
>>"Fixinto" is one word (I'm fixinto go to the store).
>>
>>Sweet Tea is appropriate for all meals and you start
>>drinking it when you're 2 years old.
>>
>>"Jeeeet?" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"
>>
>>If you understand these jokes, forward them to your
>>friends from Atlanta, Georgia and those who just wish
>>they were.
From a bit south of the Big Chicken
