View Full Version : Man bashing joke for us girls
Q. What is the useless piece of skin attached to the penis?
A. A man. :P
Muuaahahahahaha!!! :D :D :D :D
This thread can be considered extremely sexist. If I'm going to be closing threads that are extremely racist, shouldn't I close this one to?
This could be considered as such as could many of the threads in other forums. I haven't popped into those to burst anyone's bubble though. Delete it if you will. :)
I don't see any other threads with a sexist or racist theme. I don't see any with extreme racial slurs either. If you'd like to point them out for me, send me a PM. This thread is locked until I chat to the admins whether this type of thread is against the rules or not.
Have a nice day! ;) :D
Professur
4/19/02, 12:06am
Q: What's big, fat and stuck on the end of a penis?
A: His wife.
Feel better SB? the score's 1-all.
lol prof on both counts, how's this -
Several years ago, Great Britain funded a study to determine why the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft. The study took two years and cost over $180,000. The results concluded that the reason the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the man with more pleasure during sex.
After the results were published, the French declared that the British were wrong and decided to conduct their own study of the same subject. After three years of research and a cost in excess of $50,000, they
found that the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to provide the woman with more sexual pleasure.
When the results of the French study were released, Australia decided to conduct its own study. So, after nearly three weeks of intensive research and a cost of around $75, the Aussie study was complete. They came to the conclusion that the reason the head of a man's penis is larger than the shaft is to prevent his hand from flying off and hitting him in the forehead
:D
MitchSchaft
4/19/02, 12:24am
I'll agree with the Aussies!
Cleveland
4/19/02, 12:33am
I say let them bash away... I'm married.... I'm used to it.
Guy and a girl were driving down the road in a Ferrari. Girl looks at guy and says "Can't this thing go any faster?"
Guy wants to sound intelligent, so he rattles off this BS about the wieght and distribution there of. And concludes by saying "if the car were lighter, it would."
They look around and can find nothing that they can throw out..... except their clothes. So out they go.
They go down the road flying. Guy looks over, and being the typical guy he is, thinks " I need some of that right now!"
So he talks her into it, and they proceed to go at it, still flying down the road.
Guy wrecks the car, girl is thrown free, guy is pinned, car is on fire.
Guy says" GO GET HELP!"
Girl says she cant, shes naked.
Guy looks around and all he can find to throw her is a shoe. She takes the shoe, covers what she can, and runs a farmhouse they passed.
She runs up to the farmer on the front porch and says "Help me! My boyfriend is stuck!"
Farmer looks at her and says, "Lady, if he's in THAT far.... I can't help you know!"
This is getting kinda dirty... I new I was right to lock it. :D
Professur
4/19/02, 12:36am
'fess up, SB. You love it.
What's love got to do with it? :D
Professur
4/19/02, 12:42am
Man I hate that song. Ever since I heard Her admit during an interview that she didn't like that song until it started making money.
Q: What's the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth?
A: Einstien's penis
BTW: I don't believe this. just heard it on a movie :D
:D I guess this thread has turned into battle of the sexes lol
Professur
4/20/02, 04:19pm
Well we're better armed (or legged) than you are.
Professur
1/27/04, 06:15pm
Man can I kill a thread.
Q: What's the smartest thing to ever come out of a woman's mouth?
A: Einstien's penis
:rofl4: :rofl2: :rofl: :lol:
ROFLMAOLOL
Nah, this is how to kill a thread ;)
Q:Why do women have periods?
A: Because they deserve them!
Ms Ann Thrope
1/27/04, 08:29pm
Nah, this is how to kill a thread ;)
Q:Why do women have periods?
A: Because they deserve them!
nope, Oz :nono: that's not how to kill a thread, it's how to kill an OTC member :gun:
feeling lucky? :gun2:
nope, Oz :nono: that's not how to kill a thread, it's how to kill an OTC member :gun:
feeling lucky? :gun2:
I've got worse ones than that..........steady yer guns ;)
Ms Ann Thrope
1/27/04, 08:38pm
I've got worse ones than that..........steady yer guns ;)
:eek6:
Man can I kill a thread.nah, this one at least wasn't you...someone else had already killed the joy right out of that one :grumpy:
*bitchslaps him for memory's sake*
unclehobart
1/27/04, 09:45pm
Q. How are husbands like lawn mowers?
A. They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odours, and half the time they don't work.
Q. How can you tell when a man is well hung?
A. When you can just barely slip your finger in between his neck and the noose.
Q. How do men define a "50/50" relationship?
A. We cook-they eat; we clean-they dirty; we iron-they wrinkle.
Q. How do men exercise on the beach?
A. By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Q. How do you get a man to stop biting his nails?
A. Make him wear shoes.
Q. How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A. Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals."
Q. How does a man show he's planning for the future?
A. He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
Q. How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male?
A. All he's concerned with is legs, breasts and thighs.
Q. What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant?
A. Any place without a drive-up window.
Q. What do you call a handcuffed man?
A. Trustworthy.
Q. What makes a man think about a candlelight dinner?
A. A power failure.
Q. What should you give a man who has everything?
A. A woman to show him how to work it.
Q. What do men and mascara have in common?
A. They both run at the first sign of emotion.
Q. What do men and pantyhose have in common?
A. They either cling, run, or don't fit right in the crotch!
Q. What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man?
A. His wife is good at picking out clothes.
Q. What's a man's definition of a romantic evening?
A. Sex.
Q. What's a man's idea of honestly in a relationship?
A. Telling you his real name.
Q. What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups?
A. Put the remote control between his toes.
Q. What's the difference between Big Foot and intelligent man?
A. Big Foot's been spotted a several times.
Q. What's the smartest thing a man can say?
A. "My wife says..."
Q. Why can't men get mad cow disease?
A. Because they're all pigs.
Q. Why do men like smart women?
A. Opposites attract.
Q. Why do men name their penises?
A. Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 90% of their decisions.
Q. Why do men need instant replay on TV sports?
A. Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Q. Why do men whistle when they're sitting on the toilet?
A. Because it helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q. Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven?
A. Because if they all went, it would be Hell.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A widow.
Q. When do you care for a man's company?
A. When he owns it.
Q. What do men and sperm have in common?
A. They both have one in a million chance of becoming a human being.
freako104
1/27/04, 10:50pm
:rofl: so true
Why Men Get Out of Bed
A recent survey was conducted to discover why men get out of bed in the middle of the night:
- 5% said it was to get a glass of water.
- 12% said it was to go to the toilet.
- 83% said it was to go home.
:D
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